Eccentric Roommates: A Survival Guide
by Emily Beauchene
Summary: Everyone seemed to have a different opinion about this Heracles Karpusi. However, Kiku tried to keep an open mind as he put his hand on the doorknob of their shared room. The sight he was greeted with, however, made his blood freeze. As far as he could tell, Heracles was definitely someone he would consider eccentric. Hetalia human/college AU.
1. Chapter 1

Kiku stood outside of his new dorm room that he was meant to share with someone that was rumored to be a _bit_ eccentric. Everyone seemed to have a different opinion about this Heracles Karpusi. However, Kiku tried to keep an open mind as he put his hand on the doorknob of their shared room. Though some of what he had been told kept snaking into his mind.

"Oh? Him? He's quite a _fun_ one if you ask me," Francis had said with a mischievous wink and smile.

Sadiq had only said, "I can't stand his stupid guts. Get a different room as soon as you can."

Arthur only mumbled quietly about crazy philosophy majors and how Heracles could go on and on about the subject.

At least his new dorm mate seemed to be intelligent from what he could gather. Kiku didn't have anything against Feliciano, he was amazing in art and literature, but having to help him every single night for at least three hours their freshman year, with even just simple math, really took a toll on some of Kiku's grades. Of course he still got all A's in all of his classes, just not 100% in all of his classes. However, a few 98%s for three classes wasn't so bad. After all, he had helped Feliciano pass math with a B, so he would accept the lower percentages.

He hoped his new roommate wouldn't find him boring, all Kiku did was study. In the same sense, though, he hoped his roommate wouldn't try to drag him out to places like parties and such things. Kiku would rather just stay in his room and read a book or watch some DVDs if he had spare time.

Gathering his courage, Kiku opened the door to his new shared room, attempting to put on a small smile to seem friendlier. He didn't even know if Heracles was in the room at the time, he might have been out and about. Either way, it didn't really matter; the best option was always the most prepared option. The sight he was greeted with, however, made his blood freeze.

He and Heracles had a brief time of eye contact, and Kiku couldn't help but be drawn into those dusky green eyes. Kiku backed away just seconds later, and shut the door. He took a few more steps back, his throat dry and his heart racing. Already, he could feel the blush on his face as he grabbed his things and walked as fast as possible down the hallway to where he knew Feliciano's room was, knocking hastily to get in.

The bouncy Italian answered within a flash, and Kiku had been dragged into a hug that crushed his lungs. Feliciano always seemed so tiny, but he seemed to contradict that appearance with his hugs. He then proceeded to pull Kiku into his room, blabbering on and on until Kiku put a hand on his shoulder, giving Feliciano a horrified look.

"I need to switch rooms," he said.

.

After a few hours spent being calmed by his Italian friend, Kiku eventually returned to his room, holding his luggage in such a firm grip that his knuckles became paper white. There was no way that Heracles was still engaged in such activities after so many hours, right? He had no idea how to be sure; Francis had said he was a "fun one".

Kiku shook his head and sighed to himself, he'd only had a glimpse of his roommate and already he was letting other people's opinions make an image for the other boy. This time, Kiku knocked on the door, waiting for a response. He waited for what seemed like hours but nothing happened, no sound of movement, no one answering the door, nothing. So Kiku knocked again, and waited again. He made sure to wait a bit longer than last time before deciding it was safe to enter.

Still wanting to be sure, Kiku just barely opened the door, only wide enough for him to peek inside of the room. As far as he could tell, it seemed empty. So for the first time that afternoon, Kiku actually entered his room he shared with who he would definitely consider eccentric. Not in a bad way, just in a way that he was something Kiku was definitely not used to.

The Japanese boy set down his bags, sighing in relief as feeling flooded into his fingers once more. He looked around the room, and noticed that Heracles had already claimed one half for himself, small details giving his presence away. He seemed rather tidy at first glance, with a few books in the corner of the desk, and some family photos. Kiku was curious, but he decided it would be rude to snoop.

Instead, he went to the unclaimed half of the room, and began setting up some of the things he had brought with him. Pictures of family, friends and of course pictures of his dog Pochi. He pulled his laptop out of his bag, set in on the desk, and went straight to the internet.

Kiku checked all of the usual social network sights, cringing slightly at photos Alfred had uploaded of him and Arthur together. It wasn't that Kiku had anything against them being together; in fact he'd been the one responsible for getting the two to meet. It was just that he didn't really want their relationship shoved in his face. That was probably why he couldn't stop thinking of when he'd first seen Heracles. The image would probably haunt him for the rest of his life.

Heracles had looked calm enough when he looked up at Kiku from where he had been resting between…

Kiku shook his head, noticing his heart rate had sped up and knowing that his face was definitely as red as it could get. Again, Kiku didn't have anything against Heracles; he just didn't really want to know that his roommate could be so intimate. Maybe she had been his girlfriend, but even so Kiku didn't want anything to do with it. If she _was_ his girlfriend, they would need to set up a system immediately that allowed Kiku to know if she was visiting. Anything would do, he just needed some sort of signal.

He shut his laptop after an hour of browsing, and then texted Feliciano if he wanted to go get dinner. Kiku didn't necessarily _want_ to go, but he supposed it would be polite after he had spent four hours holed up in Feliciano's room unable to say what had happened, effectively worrying the Italian. Feliciano's response was an instant "yes" with approximately ten exclamation marks. Kiku felt himself smile a little, while he could be a handful, he was always chipper and it was a nice change of pace.

Kiku quickly changed into clothes he hadn't been wearing all day, and made sure he looked presentable before leaving his room and going to Feliciano's. He was met halfway by the brunet, who hugged him like they hadn't just seen each other an hour earlier.

"Do you mind if Ludwig comes?" Feliciano asked, smile bright and as wide as possible. "He is my roommate! He seems really scary, but he's just really quiet! I promise he's nice!"

Kiku glanced behind Feliciano at who he assumed was Ludwig, and he was the tallest man Kiku had ever seen. He couldn't imagine the blond somehow fitting onto the tiny beds they were given. As Feliciano had said, he had a stern scowl on his face, and his arms were crossed, but he seemed like a nice person.

Wanting to be polite, Kiku broke his hug with Feliciano, and offered his hand to Ludwig. "My name is Kiku Honda; it is nice to meet you."

Ludwig examined Kiku for a moment with piercing blue eyes, before taking the hand offered. "Ludwig Beilschmidt."

"Does your roommate want to come?" Feliciano asked, waving down the hallway as he saw Heracles entering Kiku's room.

The blood drained from Kiku's face, and he shook his head, trying to pull Feliciano away from the area and towards the exit of the dorm building. "No, he said he would rather stay in the room tonight. He wants to rest from unpacking."

Feliciano seemed shocked, furrowing his eyebrows at Kiku. "When did you talk to him?"

Kiku just continued shaking his head, managing to pull Feliciano out of the exit and towards the dining area of campus. He didn't want any sort of interaction with Heracles while the image was still so fresh in his mind. He hadn't even heard the girl, and he had been too shocked when he opened the door to see if perhaps they had been just a little more risqué than the average couple. The thought of what Heracles might have in his dressers instead of clothes turned his face beet red, and he looked down at his feet as he walked. He couldn't have Feliciano or Ludwig noticing and making a big scene out of it.

.

Dinner passed with idle small talk about the weather, classes, the town, the atmosphere, and such things. Nothing in particular was memorable, aside from Feliciano had tripped over someone's extended leg as he came to sit down at the table with Kiku and Ludwig, and without missing a beat, Ludwig stood from his chair and caught Feliciano. His tray of food went everywhere, causing quite a mess, but the look of mortification on Ludwig's face when his eyes met Feliciano's was all too perfect.

The blond went with Feliciano to apologize to the janitorial staff for the mess, and then to go get Feliciano a new tray of food after explaining what had happened. When they returned, Ludwig was looking even more flustered than before, but Kiku didn't say anything. He just couldn't believe how quickly they had become so close.

As he approached his room, Kiku attempted to gather his courage. What if Heracles had his girlfriend over? What if he wasn't even there? Better safe than sorry, he decided. The same as earlier that day, he knocked on the door and awaited a response.

Heracles answered that time, thankfully fully clothed and apparently not having his girlfriend over. "Did you forget your key?" he asked.

His voice was quiet and low, but even then Kiku could still hear his very distinct and thick accent. "Um, no," Kiku said, already feeling his blush creeping up his neck and ears like a curious but unwelcome spider in the middle of the night. "I just, didn't want to interrupt. Like I did earlier. I don't even know if your girlfriend is here, I just wanted to be safe."

Nodding, the brunet opened the door and stepped back, going to his desk where his laptop was open. Kiku shut the door behind him as he entered, barely hearing Heracles as he said "She's not my girlfriend."

"She isn't?" Kiku asked, going to his own laptop. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to assume."

Heracles just shrugged.

The rest of the night had a very tense air for Kiku; he doubted it was the same for Heracles. Kiku just couldn't settle himself and couldn't stop thinking. He and Heracles hadn't really had a proper introduction yet, but wasn't it a bit too late to do so now? If he introduced himself tomorrow it would be even more awkward, but he couldn't continue living in the same room as Heracles knowing he hadn't properly introduced himself.

At around ten Heracles shut his laptop, and stretched out on the bed he had claimed. He fell asleep almost instantly, and Kiku didn't know what to do. He felt rude for still having his laptop screen shining in the direction of the brunet, and he still had his lamp turned on. His roommate didn't seem to mind, though.

Kiku stayed up until about three in the morning, as he didn't have classes early in the morning the next day and he hadn't felt tired until then. As quietly as possible, he moved into the other bed, pulling the covers up to his chin. His heart raced just knowing what had happened in the bed next to his, all he could hope was that Heracles had washed his bedding afterwards. Kiku shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut; it was none of his business what his roommate did or didn't do. As long as they figured out some sort of system so Kiku would know if Heracles had a… guest, Kiku didn't care what he did.

* * *

A/N: The update for To Save You is not far behind, honestly. I have just had this idea on my mind for a while now, and it is a nice change from writing an overly confident person to a quieter person.


	2. Chapter 2

Kiku was thankful for the few classes he shared with Sadiq. In almost all of his other classes, he knew no one and preferred not to talk and end up stuffing his foot in his mouth. He had hoped he would share some classes with either Feliciano or Ludwig, but neither of them were in a historical major. Feliciano was an art major, and despite how he appeared and acted, Ludwig was a culinary major. And despite only having known Ludwig for less than a week, Feliciano claimed the cakes he made were divine, and that not even Francis could make something better.

Heracles, unlike Ludwig, hadn't done anything impressive. Not to say he wasn't an impressive person, he was in all higher-level classes and was in class for up to twelve hours some days. Even Kiku didn't have a schedule as full as Heracles'. But Kiku hadn't heard a single "philosophy monologue" as Arthur called them.

"You mean he hasn't said one philosophical word to you?" Sadiq asked after their shared calculus class.

Kiku shook his head.

Sadiq laughed for a while, giving Kiku a couple firm smacks on the back. "That just means when he finally does talk, you're in for more than an earful."

"Why don't you like him?" Kiku asked as they both searched for somewhere that wasn't too crowded to eat lunch. "Did you two just not get along?"

"Not get along?" Sadiq repeated, incredulous. "It was more than just not getting along, Kiku. We couldn't stand the sight of each other. Every day we'd fight or get into arguments, especially when he started rambling and I interrupted him." Kiku made a mental note, _don't interrupt Heracles while he is 'rambling'._

"Did you ever consider switching rooms?"

"Well, of course we did, Kiku, but that's not the point here. He's just too hard to get along with and doesn't say anything worthwhile or do anything but sleep, go to class, and have sex. I don't know how he passes all of his classes, or gets more action than I do, but he does."

Kiku blushed just thinking about the first time he had seen Heracles. The memory was still very fresh in his mind, every single detail burned into his retinas. Thankfully, though, there hadn't been any more incidents. Heracles hadn't had a single guest over since that first day. Kiku wasn't complaining.

"We did actually think of transferring rooms, but we never did. Over winter break I went back to my parents' house, but Heracles stayed in the dorm. Without him my days were silent, and I didn't have a constant pestering presence loitering about. At first it was nice, but eventually it got to be pretty lonely."

"I guess I do not understand..." Kiku mumbled, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

"Well, I'm not really sure how to explain it. I guess it's fun to hate him? But that's not really an accurate way of saying it."

Kiku just nodded. All of this seemed far too strange to him.

.

After the shared free time both he and Sadiq had that was dedicated to lunch was over, Kiku only had one other class with someone he knew. Well, more with someone he was acquainted with rather than someone he knew.

The only way Kiku knew Arthur was through a literature class their freshman year. Even then, they never really talked. They only met each other because of a group project they had done together. Kiku knew Alfred much better. However, he wished he knew Arthur better. The only things he knew about Arthur were that he really loved poetry, and he also really loved Alfred, despite claiming that he wasn't in _love_.

His obsession with poetry was magnificent, as magnificent as his eyebrows. On request, or just out of nowhere, Arthur could recite any classical poem from any author. He prided himself with knowing nearly all of Shakespeare's works.

Like their freshman year, the class he shared with Arthur was classical literature. Kiku had taken the class specifically so he could dedicate time to getting to know the Englishman better, but Arthur was the perfect student. He never skipped, never spoke, and only ever focused on the teacher. But after classes, he was a completely different person. He was loud and sometimes very rude, but only around people he knew. With Kiku, he still acted like the perfect person. Kiku did the same, so he couldn't really blame Arthur.

The only problem with wanting to spend some minutes after class with Arthur, was that Alfred's engineering class ended ten minutes before their literature class, and he met Arthur every day.

"You don't have to bother, stupid," Arthur would mumble, despite taking Alfred's outstretched hand. He would then lean up just a little bit, and Alfred would give him a soft peck on the lips.

"Yeah, I know I don't have to, but I actually enjoy your grumpy-butt attitude sometimes," Alfred responded. Arthur rolled his eyes. Kiku felt his throat go dry at the exchange. He still wasn't used to such open displays of affection. He almost preferred when the two of them were still trying to hide that they were in a relationship. "Hey, Kiku!" Alfred said as he noticed the shorter college student. "Wanna go get some pizza?" Kiku wasn't really hungry, but he couldn't just say no.

"I'd be glad to come," Kiku said, a polite smile on his features. Alfred laughed loudly, dragging Arthur towards one of the many on-campus locations that sold pizza. Kiku followed after quietly, observing the two. Their interactions were, he supposed, very cute. Still, the idea of being in a relationship sort of scared him. Perhaps, according to Feliciano, he just hadn't met the right person.

"After all," Feliciano had said, grinning and giving Kiku a playful wink, "Lovino said he would never fall in love, but look at him now."

Kiku didn't share any classes with Lovino, and he was an art major like Feliciano, so they were on completely opposite sides of the campus, so he had no idea what Feliciano had been referring to. Had Lovino found a girlfriend? Kiku supposed that was good for him, probably someone soft-spoken but still able to put up with his bad attitude and temper.

As the trio arrived at the pizza place, Arthur and Kiku chose a table while Alfred went to get them all food. The atmosphere seemed tense to Kiku, what with both of them avoiding eye contact, Kiku paying very diligent attention to his phone even though he had no one to text, and Arthur staring out of the window, at the oh-so-interesting stream of infinite car traffic.

Arthur tapped his fingers on the table, and eventually turned to Kiku. "So... how are classes going for you?" he asked.

"Very well."

Arthur nodded. Kiku scolded himself for making the situation even more awkward. Eventually he put his phone back into his pocket, not wanting to be rude. Arthur attempted to start another conversation. "Do you and Heracles get along?"

"I suppose so. We do not talk much to each other."

"That's a shame," Arthur responded. He opened his mouth as if to say more, but apparently decided against it. The two fell silent again.

Kiku instantly opted to turn the conversation to something that Arthur enjoyed, just so they would actually be able to talk. "Did you read any good books over the summer break?" he asked.

Arthur's green eyes instantly lit up with interest. "I did, actually. Well, I mostly just reread books, ones that I hadn't read since high school. _Lord of the Flies_, fabulous book, despite what Alfred says, was the first one I read. I do love that book."

"I have not read it before," Kiku said.

Arthur gave him such a horrified look, it was as though Kiku had just admitted to murder. "Well we'll have to rectify that won't we?" he said, his shocked expression fading into a warm smile. "I also recommend _Night_, _A Long Way Gone_, and-"

"Arthur, shut up about your books for once, kay?" Alfred interrupted. "I'm sure Kiku doesn't really care, besides, we have pizza now!"

Kiku wanted to say something, but stayed quiet as Arthur took the job of scolding Alfred for him. "Alfred, don't just assume things about people," he scoffed, "at least try to be a decent human being for once."

"Aw, Artie," Alfred whined through a mouthful and a half of unchewed pizza. Both Kiku and Arthur curled their noses, although Kiku was far more discreet about it. "You know you love me."

"I won't say I don't, but you can be fairly horrible sometimes."

"Yeah, well so can you."

Kiku found himself smiling a bit at the two as he looked up when the chime over the door sounded. He widened his eyes. All too suddenly he understood what Feliciano had been referring to with his brother. Lovino walked into the small cafe-like restaurant, hand in hand with someone Kiku had never met before. He didn't mean to assume, but there was no way that Lovino was just casually holding hands with someone. Kiku couldn't hear what they were saying, but Lovino seemed to be annoyed, while the other just laughed it off.

"Oh bollocks," he heard Arthur hiss. The blond had his head turned away from the direction of the two, his hand covering his face.

"What's wrong, babe?" Alfred asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Ex, Antonio," Arthur muttered.

Kiku stayed quiet, the air very quickly turning awkward, until Alfred laughed it off, throwing an arm around Arthur's shoulders. "Don't turn into a grouch now, we only just got our food."

Arthur gave Alfred an incredulous look, but then his shock turned soft and he smiled at the other blond. "Thank you, Alfred," he said.

Kiku once again felt as though he was seeing something he shouldn't, and averted his gaze quickly when the two kissed.

.

That evening, Kiku finally discovered what a "philosophy monologue" was. He glanced at his clock, eyes bleary and burning from being awake later than usual with nothing stimulating. Not to say that Heracles' speech hadn't started out interesting, but after five hours of the same arguments being presented and then thought over and then analyzed and then restated, Kiku had forgotten what some words meant.

It was already midnight, and Heracles didn't show any sign of stopping any time soon. Kiku was exhausted, but he didn't want to tell Heracles to be quiet or to stop, he would feel bad. It was very obvious that Heracles was very adamant and passionate about this, but Kiku couldn't take anymore.

His thoughts started wandering. Did Ludwig or Feliciano go on art and culinary rampages? He could picture very clearly the nights when Feliciano never slept, staring at a canvas. Sometimes he didn't sleep for days on end, but he also made no progress whatsoever on whatever project he was working on, just staring at the blank canvas as though it held all of life's secrets. How would Ludwig react to a night like that? Kiku wasn't sure, he still didn't know Ludwig well enough.

"Am I boring you?"

Kiku barely heard the question. But when he finally registered what had been said, he snapped to attention. "No!" he blurted out. "No," he repeated, much quieter that time as he realized their neighbors to the right and left were probably all sound asleep. "You're not boring me at all, I just became distracted." Secretly, he hoped that Heracles wouldn't have anything more to say about the subject.

Heracles, just as Kiku was thinking, looked over towards the alarm clock beside his bed. "I should probably stop talking though, it's late. And you have classes early on Thursdays, don't you?"

Kiku nodded, hoping the relief that flooded his veins didn't show on his face. "I do, but maybe you can continue on the subject some other time, it was very interesting." He felt a bit bad for lying about what he was really thinking, but he didn't want to hurt Heracles' feelings.

A very tiny smile wormed its way onto Heracles' features. "No one has ever asked me to keep talking when I go on a rant."

Kiku instantly regretted his words, but politely smiled back. "I think it is nice when people talk about things they are passionate about."

Heracles' nodded, and both of them fell silent. The whole ordeal was very awkward for Kiku, until Heracles eventually stood up, meandered to his bed, and curled up like a cat. Within seconds he was softly snoring, and all of the air Kiku had been too nervous to breathe rushed out of his lungs.

He stood up shakily, and grabbed his phone. Something in him just needed to take a walk, so he silently left the room. Without making a noise, he wandered the hallways of the dorm building. He stayed out of the girls' area, fearful of being accused of something that he didn't do, but there was enough walking room on the boys' side that he was content just walking back and forth.

At some point, he decided he would go down to the ground floor, and maybe walk around in the cool midnight air. Despite being far too warm during the days, the nights were just the perfect temperature. As he entered the stairwell though, he froze. As quietly as possible, he backed away, and reentered the hallway. Nearly the whole way back to his shared room with Heracles, he walked backwards, his gaze straight forward like a deer caught in the headlights.

Kiku fell backwards onto his bed as soon as he got into the room, staring at the ceiling. His heart was pounding so hard he feared it would leap right out of his chest. It seemed as though _everyone_ was in a relationship these days, and Kiku didn't know how to handle it.

.

The next day, Kiku tried to show up to classical literature early, having learned that Arthur was always ten minutes early to every class. He despised being late. As he entered te classroom, Arthur was already in the seat he had chosen, nose buried in a book. He glanced up and saw Kiku, his stern expression breaking into a smile as he waved.

"Kiku, here, I've brought the books I was talking about," he said.

Kiku walked over to Arthur, taking the seat next to his. "You didn't have to do that," he said.

"Oh, I know that, but I wanted to. Isn't that the nice thing to do?"

"Yes, I suppose so," Kiku replied.

Arthur handed over the three books he had mentioned, and Kiku opened up _Lord of the Flies_. The next ten minutes of pre-class time was spent in silence, aside from the occasional turning of a page. Even after the bell had rung, Kiku and Arthur didn't talk. However unlike the day before when they had gotten pizza, the silence was comfortable.

Just as usual, when the class was released, Alfred was waiting for Arthur and they went through their routine. Kiku excused himself and headed towards where he'd promised to share a late lunch with Ludwig and Feliciano.

On his way though, he saw someone he wasn't expecting.

Heracles was sitting on the grass by one of the older buildings of the campus. He was practically coated in stray cats, and Kiku felt himself smile a bit. He approached Heracles, one eyebrow raised in amusement.

"Is this how you spend your afternoons off?" he asked.

Heracles very slowly opened one eye, and sat up a bit more. A cat that had been resting on his broad chest fell to his lap, meowing loudly in protest. "I really like cats, and they really like me..." he said.

Kiku nodded, and sat next to Heracles. He softly reached out and scratched a cat behind the ear, earning a loud purr in return. After seeing one of the group had gotten attention from this new person, a few other cats went to Kiku, seeking attention as well.

"At least they are all very friendly," Kiku said.

Heracles nodded, and Kiku continued to pet the cats. He didn't know how much time had passed before he remembered his meeting with Feliciano and Ludwig.

"Would you like to come have lunch with a couple of friends and myself?" Kiku asked.

"Sure," Heracles responded. He very carefully moved all of the cats off of wherever they were perched on him, and then stood up. "What friends?" he asked.

"Feliciano Vargas and Ludwig Beilschmidt, they are very nice," Kiku said. "I have known Feliciano since last year, we were roommates then. Ludwig is Feliciano's new roommate."

Heracles hummed in acknowledgement. Kiku preferred when he was like this, when he wasn't ranting about something philosophical or saying anything weird. It was nice when he was quiet, and even nicer that neither of them felt like they needed to talk.

As they approached the small restaurant, like the pizza one he had had pizza at the day before, Feliciano could be seen inside, waving at them through the window. Ludwig seemed embarrassed, and tried to get Feliciano to sit back down. Kiku and Heracles sat with them, Kiku very quickly introducing his roommate.

"This is Heracles. Heracles, this is Feliciano, and he is Ludwig."

Ludwig and Heracles nodded at each other. As soon as they had ordered and the small talk began, Kiku instantly noticed how close Ludwig and Feliciano were sitting. Feliciano was ever so slightly leaning against the blond, laughing at everything and constantly smiling at him. Ludwig, occasionally, gave Feliciano an affectionate smile. Kiku was reminded of the scene he had seen in the stairwell, and began to blush. Heracles was the first to notice.

"Are you too warm...?" he asked, confusion written all over his face.

Feliciano, having noticed the blush now, too, tilted his head at Kiku. "Are you sick?"

Kiku shook his head. The words were catching in his throat. All he could think was that relationships were not for him, he would never be in a relationship. The looks Feliciano and Ludwig had shared in the stairwell were far too intimate for Kiku's liking, and he could never see himself like that with someone else. Arthur and Alfred's relationship was far different, but he still didn't like the idea of it.

"I'm fine," he finally choked out, despite being far from the definition of fine.

* * *

A/N: Chapter two aka I stuff my otps down your throats. It's not all pointless shipping though, as much as it seems like it.

A/N 2: hhhhhhhhhh I'm so sorry I only just noticed all of the spelling errors. I have purchased a new laptop recently and have yet to buy a word processor with a grammar and spell check, I have fixed the problems though. I apologize for the below average quality before I went through and checked.


	3. Chapter 3

Kiku stared up at the clouds as they slowly passed over the azure sky. Heracles was next to him, fast asleep and covered in at least ten of his stray cat friends. They had been laying there for hours, with no need to talk at all. Ever since dinner with Ludwig and Feliciano, the two started sitting together whenever they both had afternoons off. It wasn't a frequent occurrence, but it was still nice.

_ "Are you too warm...?" Heracles asked, confusion written all over his face._

_ Feliciano, having noticed the blush now, too, tilted his head at Kiku. "Are you sick?"_

Most of the times their afternoons together turned into Kiku reading some book Arthur had slipped into his bag, while Heracles fell asleep. The times when Heracles was awake for long enough, they talked about this and that, nothing too much.

_"I'm fine," he finally choked out, despite being far from the definition of fine._

_ Feliciano gasped, realization sparking in his coffee brown eyes. He grinned, and leaned forward, barely inches from Kiku's face, who was trying his hardest to disappear into his shirt. "Do you like someone?" the Italian asked._

One of the cats pawed at Kiku's arm, and obligingly he lifted it into his lap. This cat Heracles had _very_ originally named Mittens. Though, unlike most cats with the name Mittens, Mittens had no 'mittens'. She was an all black cat, with one white spot on the bridge of her nose. Kiku softly ran a hand down her spine, thankful that all of the cats Heracles kept as company didn't have any sort of fleas or worms.

_Kiku quietly sighed, thankful that Feliciano's realization had been wrong, and it wasn't known by him or Ludwig that he had seen them in the stairwell. He shook his head._

_ "No, that isn't true," Kiku said. His voice was calm, and he was telling the truth, but Feliciano grinned. Next to him, Heracles frowned a little bit._

_ "I know you do!" Feliciano cheered, a wide grin on his face. "Who is it? Is she pretty? Or is it a boy? Is he handsome?"_

_ Kiku paled at all of the questions. Ludwig, having noticed, was about to speak before Heracles cut him off._

_ "Maybe you should save the questions for another time," he said. "It is rude to bother people." Ludwig was impressed with the way the brunet handled Feliciano's overly excited behavior._

_ "Aw, that's no fun!" Feliciano cried, but he fell silent afterwards, if only for a few moments. Kiku couldn't have asked for a better roommate and friend than Heracles._

"Kiku?"

Suddenly Kiku was brought back into the present, rather than dwelling on that awkward dinner. Heracles had sat up next to him, and was watching him with one eyebrow slightly raised.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked.

"Oh, um," Kiku paused for a moment, "just about what I will write for my final project in literature." He really had no idea why he had lied.

"Have you chosen a book to write about yet?"

"Well, I would have done _Lord of the Flies_, it really was very good as Arthur said, but he's already doing his report on it. He has probably already finished it. I don't really know what book to choose."

Heracles hummed in response. A few minutes later, he removed all felines from his body, mostly his shoulders, lap and the top of his head, and stood up. The cats meowed in protest. "I have a class to go to," he said. "I'll see you back at the room."

Kiku nodded, and then stood up as well. He waved a little bit as Heracles went on his way, pace slow and relaxed as ever. Once the brunet was out of sight, Kiku went back to the dorm, and upstairs to his and Heracles' room. He looked around at the tiny room with a little sigh of content. He and Heracles both shared an appreciation for cleanliness, although Kiku was more rigorous about it, but they kept their room in order and that was good enough for him.

Although Kiku decided after the first time he cleaned the room he would go nowhere near Heracles' side of the room. When he had started to clean, he already knew he wouldn't go through Heracles' things, that would have been rude, but he was sure he wouldn't mind if Kiku straightened out the textbooks and novels on the shelves above his desk.

He was at the end of one of the shelves when all of the books decided to jump ship at the same time. Every single book crashed around Kiku, and he stared at the mess in dismay for a few seconds. All he had wanted to do was straighten the books, but really he had made everything worse. That's hen he saw something that caught his attention. It was a magazine of some sort, one that Kiku couldn't read a word of. He knew Heracles returned home to Greece with his mother every summer, maybe it was something from there.

Kiku pried the magazine out from under the books, but dropped it a second later. Was constant sex (according to Sadiq) not enough for Heracles? Kiku had no right to judge, but he hadn't been expecting to pick up a porn magazine.

Kiku shook his head, reverting back to the present for the second time that day. As he'd thought then, he had absolutely no right to judge Heracles. So what if he was a bit... eccentric? That didn't matter to him. He'd made a very close friend, something he rarely did anymore. His step-brother claimed that when he was little, he was the most popular kid in his school. For some reason, all of that changed in middle school. Kiku didn't mind his close ring of friends, he actually preferred it.

.

"_Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer's Day_, by William Shakespeare."

Arthur groaned next to Kiku, rolling his vibrant green eyes that were constantly hidden behind a fringe of dirty blond hair and his massive eyebrows.

"Do you not like this poem?" Kiku whispered as the other student began to recite their poem.

"No," Arthur whispered back, glancing at Kiku, "it's just that every single year since about sixth grade, in every literature and English class I've been in, there's a poetry recitation unit, someone has done this poem."

Kiku nodded. He could see how so much repetition could get on Arthur's nerves. The blond rarely ever liked monotonous things, Kiku had noticed. He supposed it was part of the reason he got along so well with Alfred, the other boy kept him on his toes at all times.

"It _is_ a nice poem, one of my favorites actually," Arthur continued. The professor shot them both a glare. "I just can't stand another recitation ever again. Otherwise I'm afraid that I will start to hate it."

"Kirkland," the professor snapped, "and you too, Kiku, please be silent while other students are performing." Both Kiku and Arthur sank into their collars, their ears red. Although Arthur seemed somewhat indignant. "Continue," their professor said, gesturing at the student.

"Sorry," Arthur whispered to Kiku.

"Kirkland, what did I just say?"

"Sorry, sir," Arthur apologized. For the rest of the class period he was silent.

As the end of the class rolled around, Kiku was amazed to see that Alfred wasn't waiting in the usual spot for Arthur.

"Where is Alfred?" he asked.

Arthur groaned, raising his eyebrows a bit at Kiku. "The idiot went and got himself sick. And because of it, he's been avoiding _me_ as if _I _have the plague. Really, he should take better care of himself. But all he does is eat unhealthy food and drink soda, and then eat more unhealthy food. I'm amazed he isn't sick every other week and morbidly obese."

Kiku quietly laughed. "It is not nice to say those things about Alfred," he said with a smile, knowing that Arthur wasn't really being mean.

"Well you _know_ it's true! If he were a normal human being, I wouldn't doubt that he would have died with how he eats!" Arthur snapped. "He's got the metabolism of three men shoved into one, it's horrible."

"It will catch up to him one day, and then you can say 'I told you so'," Kiku said, still softly laughing.

Arthur shook his head, a soft smile on his face. "No, I can't say that. I've never once said anything about his weight, he can get touchy about it sometimes. However I do force him to eat some vegetables every now and then, despite his complaints, the big idiot. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Kiku nodded, and he and Arthur both went their separate ways.

.

At first, Kiku had thought a shared lunch with Sadiq and Heracles had been a good idea. He had figured out that on Wednesday afternoons, the three of them all had two hours with no classes, the perfect time to get together. However, he couldn't have just invited both of them saying that the other would be there, he would have been denied on the spot.

Sadiq was, of course, open to the idea of sharing lunch with Kiku.

"We used to have lunch every day together!" he said, loud as ever. "Then you started hanging out with _him _more. What's so cool about him? Don't you think I'm much better than he is?" he asked.

"I think you both have your own individual strengths and weaknesses," Kiku very diplomatically answered. He should have realized with the way Sadiq said _him_ that a shared lunch would be a bad idea, but he tried to stay positive.

Heracles, after all, never mentioned Sadiq, and maybe he didn't dislike the other as much as Sadiq disliked him. "Lunch?" he asked, petting Mittens who had been resting on his chest. "Yes, that seems nice," he said.

But when Wednesday afternoon rolled around, everything crashed around Kiku like Heracles' books he had attempted to clean. He and Sadiq, after their shared math class, walked to where they were meant to have lunch. The walk there was casual and calm, just like good friends.

"How are you doing in your classes?"

"Very well," Kiku responded. "What about you? Are you having any troubles?"

Sadiq laughed, waving his hand in a nonchalant way. "Of course I'm not having any troubles. I never have trouble, it's not something I'm capable of." Kiku softly laughed. "Have you been keeping in touch with your family? Mine won't leave me alone."

Kiku nodded, thinking of all of his younger cousins that were always bothering him through Skype. "Yes, I talk to my family often. We are all very close."

"Well that's-" Sadiq froze mid-sentence and mid-step, staring wide-eyed at his and Kiku's spot.

Heracles was stretched out on his back, lounging in the early afternoon sun. He hadn't heard or seen them coming, and his eyes remained peacefully shut.

"Kiku, let's find a different spot," Sadiq hissed, grabbing Kiku's forearm and attempting to pull him back the way they came.

"No, Sadiq, hold on a minute," Kiku insisted, breaking free. "I asked him to have lunch with us."

"You _what_?" Sadiq shouted. That caught Heracles' attention. He sat up, found where the noise came from, and his whole expression fell. Kiku could see the dark look on his face even from a distance. "Why would you do that?" Sadiq hissed. "I can't stand that brat!"

"Please," Kiku said, grabbing Sadiq's wrist. "Just one lunch, I promise it will not be that bad, I promise."

Sadiq eventually gave in, and they walked over to their usual lunch spot.

"What is he doing here?" Heracles asked when the two of them were in ear shot. "I do not want to eat lunch with a smelly old man."

"You shut your mouth!" Sadiq snapped.

Kiku sat down across from Heracles in the grass, and Sadiq chose a spot closer to Kiku than to Heracles. The brunet noticed this, and inched closer to Kiku.

"Both of you calm down," Kiku said, though his tone was serious. "I invited both of you because you are both my friends. I do not mean to make either of you uncomfortable or unhappy, but please understand."

They stopped bickering for just long enough to eat a few bites of food, but then they were back at it, their comments steadily becoming worse and worse.

"Have any good pussy recently?" Sadiq asked. "Oh wait, the only pussy you get is stray cats. You can't do anything with those."

"I am sure that your sex life has been as unsuccessful as usual if you are resorting to taking a jab at mine."

"It's not my fault you'll sleep with anything!"

"That's not true at all."

"Oh yeah? Name one thing you wouldn't sleep with."

"You."

Sadiq's face turned impossibly red, and Kiku quietly sighed. All of this was really starting to get on his nerves. He hadn't even been able to finish his lunch.

"Would both of you stop acting like children?" he asked.

Heracles nodded, while Sadiq stubbornly crossed his arms.

"We wouldn't be acting like children if Heracles would grow up already."

Kiku could practically see Heracles struggle to not say anything, but eventually he gave in. "Look who's talking," he said. "If you weren't so childish, maybe you would have a girlfriend."

"If you could get over your mommy issues maybe you wouldn't have thirty girlfriends."

Heracles stood up in an instant, his normally calm green eyes glaring daggers at Sadiq. Kiku's breath hitched, and he could barely even think. He'd never seen Heracles become angry before. He stole a glance at Sadiq, who's eyes were wide.

"Wait, Heracles," he said, rubbing the back of his head in a I-really-messed-up-this-time way. "I didn't mean to say that..."

"Obviously you did, or you wouldn't have said it," Heracles snapped. Kiku was taken aback, watching the exchange in horror. "People always say they did not mean things, but if they did not mean it they would not have said it. Yes, some people's brains and mouths have less of a filter than others, but usually yours is fairly decent. Obviously it is not so much anymore. But even if you had not said it, you would have still meant it, or you never would have thought it."

"Philosopher mode," Sadiq whispered to Kiku. Kiku nodded in response.

Heracles continued with his rant, even as he turned around and walked back to the dorms in a bit of a rage, muttering to himself the whole way about people who claimed to not mean things.

Only when he was out of sight did Kiku finally remember how to breathe. "What was that about...?" he quietly asked Sadiq.

The other college student had his head in his hands, groaning and muttering like Heracles had been. "It's not my place to say," Sadiq responded. He stood up, guilt still painted all over his expression. "I have class, and so do you. Ask him some other time, once he's calmed down."

.

That night, Kiku cautiously approached his and Heracles' room that night. He was afraid the brunet would still be upset, and it made him nervous that he had no idea what to do about it. Sadiq had said "mommy issues", but Heracles had told him that every summer he stayed with his mother in Greece. Perhaps she was not his birth mother and it had caused him troubles? Kiku wasn't really sure.

He waited just outside the door, ready to enter, until he heard the unmistakable sound of someone else in their room.

"_Oh god, oh god_."

Was that... was that a _girl_? Heracles hadn't had a 'guest' over since their first day of their sophomore year. Kiku found he couldn't move his feet, rooted to the spot.

"_Oh, Heracles, fuck me_."

Definitely a girl. Kiku remembered how to walk, and steered himself in the direction of Arthur and Francis' room. He didn't want to trouble Feliciano and Ludwig another time with his roommate troubles, and when he approached his friend's room, the door was still wide open, a good sign that no lewd activities were taking place. Instead, when he approached the doorway, he saw Alfred clinging to Arthur like a little kid to his mother, whining and complaining.

"Artie, please don't go," he begged, blue eyes watering up.

"Alfred, for Christ's sake, I'm leaving for seven days, I'm not dumping you," Arthur snapped, attempting to shove Alfred off. He looked up and met Kiku's eyes, sighing in relief. "Kiku, be a dear and help me detach Alfred."

"You'll probably need a crowbar and some duct tape," Francis said. Only then did Kiku notice Arthur's roommate at his desk, typing away at his laptop.

Kiku entered the room, but kept his distance from the three of them.

"Honestly, Alfred, stop being such a baby. And Francis, if you have a problem, you can go complain elsewhere."

"Kiku," Alfred said, turning to face his friend, while still holding onto Arthur like a persistent koala, "help me keep him here! A whole week! I'll die if he's gone for a whole week!"

"This is why some genius soul invented phone and Skype sex, Alfred," Francis quipped, not taking his eyes off of the laptop screen.

Alfred's eyes lit up. "Artie, we should try that sometime!"

"Alfred, please!" Arthur snapped, his whole face and neck as red as humanly possible. "Do not discuss our personal life with two other people here!"

Alfred groaned, but eventually released Arthur, instead choosing to flop onto the Englishman's bed. "Arthur, I'm sure Francis and Kiku don't mind."

Kiku _did_ mind, but he wasn't going to say anything about it. Francis laughed with a roll of his navy blue eyes.

"Excuse me, Arthur, but where are you going?" Kiku asked.

"Kiku, it's the fall holiday, I'm leaving early because my parents have bought tickets to go visit family back in Manchester," Arthur said.

Kiku's jaw dropped, but he quickly shut it. Where had the time even gone? Had it really been months since this year had started? He supposed school always made the year go by faster for some reason. "Oh," he said, "I hope you enjoy yourself."

"Don't say that!" Alfred pleaded, sitting up on the bed. "He's leaving for a whole week!"

"It is only for a week, Alfred," Kiku said, trying o be reasonable. "Like Arthur said, he is not leaving forever."

From Francis' desk, Kiku heard him whisper a very sing-songy 'Skype and phone sex, darlings'. Arthur whipped around, glaring daggers at the back of Francis' head.

"What did you just say, frog?"

"Oh nothing, _cher_, nothing at all."


	4. Chapter 4

The first day after Arthur's departure, a Saturday, was anything but eventful. Alfred stopped by Kiku and Heracles' room once or twice, but never for long. His longest stay was only about five minutes.

"How's it going?" he asked.

Kiku was at his laptop, typing away at an essay that was due for his literature class on Monday. Heracles was stretched out on his bed, reading from his archaeology textbook.

"Fine," Kiku said, turning in his chair to face Alfred. "What have you been doing?"

"Not much," Alfred groaned, taking a casual stance against Kiku and Heracles' doorway. "Finished some homework, called Arthur, bothered Matthias and Gilbert, currently bothering you two."

Heracles hummed softly in agreement, but Alfred didn't notice. The blond only stayed for a few moments later before heading back to his room, whistling some popular song or other as he walked.

"He seems to have gotten over Arthur leaving..." Heracles mumbled, taking a break from staring at the walls of text in front of him.

Kiku nodded. "He was very upset at the time, but this is how Alfred usually is. Very dramatic at first, but then he calms down."

"Is this a regular occurrence for him...?" Heracles asked, raising an eyebrow.

Kiku nodded again, quietly chuckling. "Yes, Arthur often visits his family in Europe, and is frequently gone. They've adjusted, but Alfred always likes to make a fuss about it. Arthur denies it, but he likes the attention."

"You seem to have become better friends with him, that's good," the brunet commented. "You said earlier in the year it was one of your goals..."

For a moment, Kiku felt embarrassed that Heracles had remembered something like that. It had only been a comment in passing, the two didn't even really talk about it at all. Then Kiku felt honored that Heracles thought it worth remembering, and a tint of color came to his cheeks. "Yes, we've become very close. It has always been hard for me to make very good friends, I don't exactly talk a lot, but I wanted to change that this year."

"Would you consider us friends?" Heracles asked

"Of course I would,"Kiku assured, giving Heracles a small smile. "At first I was intimidated by you, but you're very kind. And quiet. As much as I enjoy spending time with Alfred, he can be rather loud."

Heracles nodded.

Kiku let the silence continue for a few moments as he closed and saved his essay, then shut his laptop. "Would you like to go and get dinner with me?" he asked.

Heracles looked up, his expression containing the most minute hint of doubt. "Will Sadiq be there?"

The guilt Kiku had been trying so hard to keep out of his thoughts came flooding back to him in a nerve-wracking rush. "I'm really, very sorry about that, Heracles... I thought it would be a good idea, but I didn't think about either of you before putting you into that situation. No, he will not be there, I promise."

Heracles remained silent for a minute, but then stood up, grabbing their room key off of his desk. "You've given me your word, I believe you."

Kiku sighed in relief, but pushed aside the feeling as he stood up, following after Heracles. "I didn't have anything particular in mind, so wherever you want to go is fine."

"I was just thinking the campus buffet."

Kiku cringed at the mention of the campus buffet. That was where he, Feliciano and Ludwig had eaten dinner the very first day of school, and Feliciano had gotten very violently ill. He had eaten the pudding, which Ludwig had warned him of, but if one thing in the buffet was bad, how trustworthy was anything else?

"That's fine," Kiku said. After all, he hadn't gotten sick and he wasn't a fan of pudding so there was nothing to worry about. "How have your classes been going?" he asked.

Heracles, a few steps ahead of him, shrugged. Kiku always found himself just behind the taller student. "Fine. Nothing has been too challenging or too simple. How are your classes?"

"Fine as well, all of my classes are very easy this year."

Heracles nodded in response, and the remainder of the walk and dinner were spent in silence.

.

"KIKU!"

It was ten am.

"KIKU WAKE UP YO!"

Heracles on the bed next to Kiku groaned and rolled over.

"Let's go do something fun!"

Finally, as Kiku sat up and rubbed his eyes, he put a name to the voice. Alfred. He stood up, and opened the door to reveal a bright and awake-as-ever American. His hands were in his pockets and for the chilly weather he was wearing his grandfather's bomber jacket.

"Good morning, Alfred," Kiku said quietly, shutting the door behind him. "If you could please lower your voice, Heracles is still sleeping."

Alfred nodded, but didn't lower his voice whatsoever. "A friend of mine is back from studying in Germany, we should hang out with him, he's great!"

Kiku, too polite to turn Alfred down, nodded and gave him a smile. "Yes, of course, that sounds like fun. I will get ready to go out, and then I will meet you downstairs, okay?"

Alfred nodded again, and then tore down the hallway and then down the stairs. Kiku sighed and entered his and Heracles' room. Heracles was sitting up in his bed, an annoyed look on his face.

"What was that about?" he asked, his voice rough and scratchy from sleep.

"Alfred wants to spend some time with me and a friend of his, I'm not sure who. Unfortunately he cannot keep his voice down, I apologize. You should go back to sleep."

Heracles didn't even need to be told to go back to sleep before he was laying down again, and asleep within seconds. He and Kiku had, somewhat unfortunately, taken to wasting Sundays asleep unless they had homework to do. Sundays for the pair were peaceful days, like they should have been, and were rarely interrupted by noisy dorm mates.

Only when he was certain Heracles was asleep again did Kiku change from his pajamas into a pair of jeans and a clean t shirt. As quietly as he could he went about his morning routine, and then left the room.

As soon as he was downstairs, he saw Alfred with someone Kiku thought he recognized, but he couldn't be sure. They had just engaged in some sort of over-the-top exuberant greeting, and Kiku hoped he wasn't going to be given the same treatment.

When Alfred noticed him, he waved. "Hey, Kiku! This is Gilbert, he's the friend I was talking about!"

Gilbert waved as well, a cocky grin plastered on his face. Kiku walked over to them and extended his hand to Gilbert. He raised his eyebrows and snickered, but then took Kiku's hand and shook it.

"Damn, Alfred, you weren't kidding about him being formal. But hey, you know Ludwig, don't you? You're friends with Feli, right? He's dating Ludwig so you have to know him, tall, big, quiet, scary as fuck."

Kiku nodded. "Yes, I know Ludwig. I would not call him scary, though. Do you know Feliciano?"

"Well, not directly, but I'm friends with someone who's dating Feli's brother, it's an extended form of knowing him. Sort of a friend of a friend, but more friend of a brother's boyfriend," Gilbert explained.

_He must mean Antonio_, Kiku thought. Unless Feliciano had another brother he wasn't familiar with. "Where did you two want to go?" he asked.

Gilbert shrugged with a loud laugh. "I haven't been in America for two years, let's hit up some restaurants or some movies, yeah?"

"Oh, I didn't bring any money with me," Kiku said.

"That's okay, I'll pay!" Gilbert exclaimed, throwing an arm around Kiku's shoulders. "I got a feeling, you're pretty awesome, so me and you are gonna be best friends."

.

Monday mornings were, surprisingly, very quiet for Heracles and Kiku. Neither of them had classes, while most of the other students in their dorm did, so they were practically alone. Heracles went about his business of getting ready for classes, while Kiku sat at his laptop.

So many months into living together, they had already developed a daily routine that worked out for both of them. Kiku woke up before Heracles around eight, and Heracles woke up half an hour or so later. By then, Kiku was dressed and typing away or browsing the internet, so Heracles would change. Then they waited in their usual comfortable silence until Kiku went to class at ten, and Heracles at eleven.

Rarely anyone stopped by, it was a respite period for them after a long week of classes. But of course, nothing could go to plan forever.

Kiku could practically sense him in the doorway, he didn't even have to look to know who it was.

"Is this your roommate?" Yao asked.

Kiku sighed as he turned around in his chair, Yao was in the doorway, looking pristine and well-kept as ever. Heracles, who had just finished 'brushing' his hair, which only included running a hand through his russet locks, had a bewildered expression. If it weren't for the looming presence of his step brother, Kiku would have laughed. He had never seen him look so perplexed.

"Who is this?" Heracles asked.

Yao gasped, looking at Kiku with wide eyes. "Kiku!" he exclaimed, accusation laced in his tone. "You haven't told him about me?"

"He's my brother," Kiku said. "Sort of. We both have the same mother."

Heracles nodded, still watching Yao suspiciously.

Yao examined Heracles, looking him up and down in his most scrutinizing way. "Are you making sure he eats enough, he is always so skinny."

"Yao, please, I'm right here," Kiku said with a small sigh.

"You hush," Yao responded, waving his hand in dismissal in Kiku's general direction. "You make sure he eats lots of vegetables and fruits, he has unhealthy friends." Kiku resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Yao turned his gaze to Kiku, raising his eyebrow. "And you are still so weak, Kiku." He walked over to his half-brother, and grabbed his arm, lightly squeezing his bicep. "You need to go to the gym, and get some muscles. You are so thin, you will never find a wife like that."

A dark red blush had long since been creeping into Kiku's cheeks, but now it was as obvious as ever. "Yao, can we talk about this some other time?"

"No, I'm here now, so we will talk about it now. You, roommate-"

"His name is Heracles."

"Heracles, make sure he eats and goes to bed on time. He can be like a little kid, staying up until three in the morning watching cartoons."

Heracles snickered, and Kiku blushed even more. "Don't worry, I've been taking care of him. He eats and sleeps before three."

Yao nodded, stepping back from Kiku but raising his eyebrows. "Are you not going to give me a hug? We haven't seen each other since summer, don't tell me you didn't miss me at all!"

"No, of course I missed you," Kiku said as he stood and hugged Yao. "You are just very loud and it is early in the morning."

"I am not loud," Yao said.

"But you are like a mother hen," Heracles said. "I'm sure Kiku can take care of himself."

Yao tutted, shaking his head in dismay at Heracles. "_You_ did not take care of him for eighteen years. It has been part of my life for nearly two decades to take care of him."

"How old are you?" Heracles asked.

The oldest of the three widened his eyes at Heracles in disbelief, finally releasing Kiku from the hug to put his hands on his hips. "You never ask someone their age, it's rude."

"I thought that was only for women?" Heracles asked.

Yao's chest puffed up, and he scoffed at Heracles. Kiku smiled a bit, the two were like two cats, one very uptight and the other relaxed as can be. "What are you trying to say?" he asked

Heracles shrugged. "Nothing, I didn't know you were so sensitive about your age, that's all."

Yao nodded, having decided he won what he considered to be an argument of sorts. "Well, Kiku, your roommate is rude, if I say so myself," Kiku lightly whacked Yao's arm, giving him a horrified look, "but he is good. I like him."

"It's not like I could have changed rooms if you didn't, Yao," Kiku said. "But we appreciate your approval. Don't you have work or something?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Yao asked, raising an eyebrow at Kiku. Kiku shook his head quickly. "You're right, though. I'll see you in a month, Kiku."

"A month?" Kiku asked. "Why so soon? You never come to visit me this often."

"Winter holiday, Kiku," Yao said with a sigh, shaking his head. "Aiyah, Kiku, get a calendar, it is not such a hard thing to do. Or did you forget that you will be staying at my house?"

"I forgot, sorry..." Kiku muttered.

Yao tutted and shook his head again. "Aiyah, Kiku. That's two, in less than a minute!" He gave Kiku a light smack on the back of his head. "Keep track of yourself, Kiku. Your roommate and I can only do so much for you."

Kiku nodded, attempting to shepherd Yao back to the door. "I know, Yao, but we both have class and you have work, so we'll talk later." Kiku barely waited until Yao had crossed the threshold before he shut the door. He turned around and faced Heracles, giving him his most apologetic look. "I am really sorry about him, he means well but he is obnoxious."

"I think it's sweet," Heracles said, raising his eyebrows. "I don't have anyone like that there for me."

Kiku didn't even consider his words, a rare thing for him, but as soon as he spoke he regretted it. "Sadiq said you had issues with your mother, what did he mean by that?" He clapped his hands over his mouth, eyes wide. The world stopped for a few moments as Heracles' expression turned dark.

"That's not really any of your business," he said, his voice even. He didn't seem mad at all, if anything, he seemed more upset.

"I'm sorry," Kiku said, attempting to pick up the disaster he had just made. "I don't know why I said that, I shouldn't have asked."

Heracles shrugged and stood up. "That's fine, people make mistakes. I'm going to class."

He brushed by Kiku, their shoulders just barely touching. The contact sent a jolt through Kiku, and he moved away to let Heracles through the door. When he was gone, Kiku glanced at the clock on Heracles' side of the room. It was only nine.

.

Within the blink of an eye, a week had passed and Arthur was back at school. Alfred was like a puppy that had been left along for too long, and didn't let Arthur out of his sight, only long enough to let him go to the bathroom occasionally. Even then he would whine and moan like a little kid until Arthur came back.

The three of them were lounging in Alfred's room watching movies, since his roommate Toris was out with a friend.

"They're totally dating," Alfred said through a mouthful of potato chips. Arthur gave him a disgusted look as crumbs went flying. "Everyone is dating in college and they're way too close to not be together."

"Alfred, you don't know that," Arthur said. "And please refrain from speaking with your mouth full, it's disgusting."

Alfred laughed, then looped an arm around Arthur's waist and attempted to kiss Arthur, his lips puckered in an exaggerated way. The older blond smothered laughter, trying to stay angry.

"You're horrible, Alfred!"

"You say that every day!"

"That's because it's true!"

Kiku, meanwhile, was trying to keep his attention on the movie. They were watching _Iron Man_, something Kiku and Alfred had watched at least fifty times together, but he tried his hardest to stay focused. Of course with the two of them shouting just to the right of him that was a bit of a difficult task, but he managed.

Heracles still seemed upset from the day that Kiku had ruined their morning already interrupted by Yao, so Kiku was giving him plenty of room and space to himself. He still had to think of a better way to apologize, perhaps with a gift of some sort. One idea that had come to him was asking Ludwig to help make a cake, Heracles did enjoy sweets after all. Then it wouldn't really be from him though, he wasn't the best chef.

"Are you okay, Kiku?" Arthur asked, one eyebrow raised.

"Oh, yes. Heracles and I had a fight, I was trying to think of ways to apologize," Kiku said.

Arthur nodded, thinking for a few moments before he spoke. "Why don't the two of you go off campus and get dinner somewhere nice? You could apologize to him there."

"That does seem like a good idea," Kiku said. Really, it did. He hadn't considered it until then, but he was sure Heracles would appreciate the thought.

"Just make sure he doesn't get the wrong idea, eh, Kiku?" Alfred said. He was grinning and winking, and Kiku wasn't sure if he felt flustered or frustrated.

"He wouldn't get the wrong idea," Kiku muttered. "We're just good friends."

"Yeah?" Alfred asked, raising his eyebrows. "That's what Toris says about Feliks, but they're totally doing each other." He yelped in pain when Arthur elbowed him in the gut.

"If you want to go to dinner, Kiku, you had better get back to your room and tell him," Arthur said.

Kiku nodded and stood, then quickly thanked Alfred and Arthur for having him, and left their room. Behind him, he could still hear them talking.

"You _know_ they're together, Arthur."

"Yes, but people thought the same about us when we weren't dating."

Kiku smiled just a little. Arthur had a point, but the moment the two started dating, even 'in secret', everyone for miles knew about it. They couldn't have been less subtle if they tried. As he got to his and Heracles' room, he lightly tapped on the door, just hard enough for Heracles to hear him if he was asleep.

Heracles answered the door a few moments later, his expression calm as always, and seemingly unaffected by what had happened earlier in the week. Kiku wasn't sure why, but seeing Heracles like this made him nervous, especially knowing what he was going to ask, and with Alfred's words still buzzing in his head.

"I want to apologize for what happened earlier this week, when Yao came and I asked those questions... I know I shouldn't have, I don't know what I was thinking. I was wondering if I could treat you to dinner?" Kiku asked, figuring it was better to get it all out there before Heracles got a word in edgewise.

Heracles, though, seemed as calm as ever, unfazed by Kiku's words. He stepped aside to allow his roommate entry, and scratched at his chin. Only then did Kiku notice Heracles hadn't shaved in a while, and a light stubble was coming to his cheeks and jaw.

"I hope you know I'm not angry about that, Kiku," Heracles said. "You were curious, it's okay. But dinner would be nice."

A breath Kiku didn't know he was holding escaped from him all at once, and he put a hand to his chest. His heart rate was through the roof. "Where would you like to go? I have enough money saved up to go somewhere nice if you want to."

"We don't have to go anywhere fancy," Heracles said as he started sifting through his clothes to find something decent to wear.

Kiku, figuring he looked nice enough in a long sleeve shirt and dark jeans, didn't even notice as he watched Heracles remove his shirt as he looked for another one. Normally, Kiku would have been horrified with himself that he was watching, but he found himself entranced by Heracles' broad, bronze shoulders. He had a sort of healthy glow about him all the time, probably from spending so much time in the sun, whereas Kiku rarely ever left the shelter of his desk.

Heracles finally pulled on a new shirt, and Kiku broke his stare before his roommate turned around and caught him. He slipped his wallet into his pocket, followed by a room key, and then exited into the hallway. Heracles followed shortly after him, shutting the door behind him.

"We can take my car," he said, heading towards the student parking garage outside of their dorm.

"I didn't know you had a car," Kiku mused.

Heracles shrugged. "Most people don't, I barely use it. It's only to drive from my grandparents's house to here."

"Where do your grandparents live?" Kiku asked.

"A few hours away from here. From there I take a plane to Chicago, and from there to Kilkis," Heracles explained. He pulled the key to his car out of his pocket when they arrived at the garage.

"Is that where your mother lives?"

Heracles hummed softly in response, and Kiku just knew he'd struck another nerve. He really had to stop bringing up Heracles' mother, despite how curious he was.

"What do you do when you're not in school?" Heracles asked, guiding Kiku to his car.

"I stay with either Yao or my parents, whoever is available."

Heracles nodded, unlocked his car with a click of the button on the key, and then got in. Kiku followed suit, a bit awkwardly. It was strange to be in such cramped quarters with Heracles, despite their room being much smaller than comfortable for two college students.

"I was thinking the Olive Garden that isn't too far from here?"

"That's fine," Kiku said. "I haven't been there in a while."

"The food tastes fine and it isn't too expensive for a nice dinner."

Kiku muttered a quiet agreement, and then the two of them lapsed into their usual silence. The drive to the restaurant was short, and for a Friday night it was surprisingly not busy. Kiku wondered how the two of them looked to other people, no one was looking at them, but it was something he was very conscious of. Did friends usually do things like fancy dinners, or would people assume more?

He shook his head and attempted to clear his mind of Alfred's words. He probably hadn't meant anything by them and was only teasing Kiku, but it stuck with him like that annoying fly that refuses to go away or an itch that you just can't reach.

Heracles sat down in the booth they were guided to, and Kiku sat across from him. To their left was what looked like a small business party, with five or six guests who were all dressed to the nines. They were laughing and telling stories over glasses of wine and huge platters of food, generally enjoying themselves as far as business went.

Kiku thumbed through the menu, looking over each option at least ten times, very aware of Heracles' relaxed gaze fixed on him the whole time. He knew he was avoiding talking, and Heracles must have known it, too, but he didn't say anything. At least, not for the first ten minutes while they sat waiting for someone to come by and ask for their drinks.

"Kiku, can I say something?" Heracles asked, pushing aside his own menu though he hadn't even glanced at it.

Kiku didn't want to be rude, but all he could do was nod, still hiding behind the menu. Heracles softly sighed, and Kiku felt a knife of guilt go right through his stomach. He felt bad, but he didn't have the courage to face this, _Don't let him get the wrong idea_ plaguing him to no end.

"Can you set down the menu?" Heracles asked, raising one eyebrow just a bit.

At first, Kiku did nothing. He didn't even reread the description for the fettuccine alfredo for the tenth time. It was as though everything in him stopped functioning all at once. Very slowly, Heracles lowered the menu for Kiku, and Kiku's dark eyes met Heracles' emerald eyes had his eyes really been so green the whole time Kiku had known him? His heart was racing, even though he told himself it was for no reason, and he couldn't break the eye contact. Heracles' warm, calloused hand brushed over Kiku's soft, pale hand.

"Kiku..." Time stopped. Kiku couldn't remember how to breathe. Whatever Heracles had to say he just hoped he said it faster. "Kiku I love you."

* * *

A/N: Enter Yao, one of my many otps that will be the center of the next fanfiction I write after this one is done, and some love confessions! How ever will Kiku react!


	5. Chapter 5

Kiku stared at Heracles, his eyes wide. His first instinct was to get up and run as far as he could, but Heracles had given him a ride to the restaurant and was presumably his ride back to the college, unless he caught a bus. But if he did that, Heracles would be waiting for him at their room, and he wouldn't be able to stomach the interaction.

He forced his thoughts to slow down, and closed his eyes for a few moments. Had he heard Heracles correctly? Maybe he had just been joking? Heracles didn't seem like the type to joke, and he hadn't had someone over in a long time, he spent all of his free time with Kiku, everything was adding up how was he supposed to work it all out logically?

"Could you repeat yourself?" he asked, his voice small, like a child's.

Heracles nodded. He softly ran a thumb over Kiku's hand, leaning forward and speaking clearer. "I love you, Kiku. I know I do."

Kiku shook his head, stuttering and nervous. "How could you possibly know that, we've barely known each other."

"Kiku, it's not about how long we've known each other, we've been roommates, there isn't much to hide in that situation," he said.

Kiku could see where Heracles was coming from, but it was still messing with his brain and he just couldn't think. How could it be possible? Heracles seemed to cool and smooth, and, although Kiku didn't like to judge, straight. He had never once heard of Heracles being with a man, though from the way Francis had described Heracles when the school year started, Kiku supposed it could have been true. He didn't know much about love, though.

He opened his mouth like a fish, but he couldn't find his voice. He shut his mouth again. All he wanted to do was run away and hide from the situation. For a brief moment, he pictured Yao who would scoff and scold at him for avoiding his problems.

_Be strong like Yao_ he thought.

"I don't know what to say," he muttered. He was thoroughly disappointed with himself. Was that really all he could think of?

"You don't have to say anything," Heracles said. "If you don't feel the same way, I understand. This was very sudden of me to say, and probably very rude... If you would rather leave now and go back to our room, that would be fine."

Every fiber of Kiku's being was screaming yes yes please let's leave, but he shook his head, and forced a tiny smile. "No, I am still fine with having dinner. After all, it is my apology to you for saying those things."

Heracles nodded, but didn't say anything else. As their waiter came by, the two of them fell awkwardly silent for a few seconds until Heracles ordered water and some sort of plate of pasta. Kiku did the same, and when the waiter was gone the silence became uncomfortable again. It wasn't their regular silence, one where he didn't think about anything in particular or he could read something or work on homework.

Heracles was only two feet from him, watching him attentively and curiously, studying Kiku's face for any hint of emotion. Kiku was overwhelmed, and nervous. He didn't even know how he was going to manage to finish a meal, let alone drink water. Just the thought of it was making his stomach churn in ways that were not particularly good.

He tried to do anything that would take his mind off of the situation at hand. He counted to ten thousand, watched as a light in the corner flickered, listened to the group of people near them that were having a good time.

"Do you hate me now?" Heracles asked.

Kiku shot up in his seat. "Of course not!" he exclaimed.

Of course, that had gained the whole restaurant's attention, all eyes were on him and everyone had fallen silent. He sat back down, blushing profusely.

"Of course not," he repeated, quieter that time. Heracles let out a small puff of air that was a sort of laugh for him. "I would never hate you because of this, or because of your sexuality. It's horrible to hate people that are gay, many of my friends are gay, actually."

"Kiku, calm down," Heracles said. "All I needed to know was that you didn't hate me, I don't need a speech."

Kiku nodded and looked down at the table. "Of course you don't," he mumbled. "I apologize for rambling."

Heracles shook his head a bit. "I don't mind."

Their dinner was stiff, and awkward Kiku could tell even Heracles could feel the tension in the air. It was thick enough to cut with a knife. Kiku hardly touched his food, his appetite having vanished long ago. He picked at the dinner he ordered, not even sure what it was that he _had_ ordered.

When they finished, Kiku offered to pay for dessert as well, but Heracles politely declined. They stood, and with stiff joints walked back to Heracles' car. The drive had been the same as the rest of the night, but at least when they got back to their room, Heracles was concerned with nothing other than falling right asleep.

Kiku stared at his phone as he listened to Heracles' light snoring. Should he tell Alfred or Arthur about what happened. Perhaps he could ask Feliciano for advice, he wouldn't mind helping Kiku when he was in a tight spot. Of course, Yao was an option, too, but Kiku dreaded even the thought of it. He didn't know who he could talk to, so he stayed silent.

.

Kiku couldn't study any harder than he already was, but he could already feel the things he was learning slipping from his mind. He read and read and reread his notes, but nothing was helping him to memorize the facts. For a few moments he could recite what he had read, but they were gone within a matter of minutes.

Heracles was lounging on his bed calmly, apparently not stressed at all for the midterm week that started soon. However, Heracles never seemed to stress about anything, so Kiku wasn't surprised that he seemed so nonchalant. His philosophy textbook was propped open on his chest, and he was slowly skimming the walls of black text.

"How do you handle midterms so calmly?" Kiku asked.

Heracles shrugged without looking at Kiku.

Kiku nodded. How very like Heracles. Ever since the dinner they had gone to, things had become a little more tense than usual, but the both of them had adjusted. Heracles opted not to speak, while Kiku tried to keep their communication stable.

He turned back to his own notebooks full of everything he had ever written down for each class and continued to study. Even with their door shut, Kiku could hear Alfred down the hallway in his room, laughing loudly at some movie. He assumed Arthur was with them, the both of them were very risky when it came to studying, despite Arthur looking like the student who stayed up until five in the morning getting everything done. Kiku leaned back in his chair and sighed, wishing he could join the two of them instead of locking himself up and studying all day. Already he had dismissed Sadiq three or four times.

After nearly another hour of unsuccessful studying, Heracles stood, glancing at the time on his phone.

"I have somewhere to go," he said. He didn't even wait for Kiku to respond before he was out of the door.

Kiku sighed and looked around the empty room, trying to figure out what it was missing. His freshman year he had been able to study so well, and never became distracted by the noises down the hall. What had been different then? He turned back to his desk, glancing at his phone that was lighting up occasionally with a text from Feliciano.

Suddenly it seemed as though everything had clicked into place and made sense again.

When he and Feliciano studied, he was always humming some song and it gave a decent amount of background noise that wasn't too distracting. Occasionally he would strike up a conversation, but it wouldn't be for too long, and then he would go back to humming.

_Would you like to study with me?_ The text was simple, and Feliciano would probably send a paragraph back, but he got his point across, and that was good enough for him.

_Of course I would!_ the message came faster than usual for Feliciano. _It's been so long since we've really spent time together! It would be fun! Also Ludwig is with his brother, so I'm all alone today!_ Kiku smiled at all of the exclamation marks, Feliciano's chipper attitude could always cheer him up, even if sometimes he was a lot to handle.

Just a few seconds later Feliciano was bursting into Kiku and Heracles' room, no consideration at all to knock first, but Kiku didn't mind. He gave Feliciano a small smile.

"It's good to see you," he said.

Feliciano was nodding and bouncing up and down a bit. Kiku could tell he was itching for a hug, so he stood up and braced for the lung-crushing hug he was hit with not a second later.

"I miss you so much!" Feliciano cried. "We never see each other anymore!"

Kiku nodded, lightly patting Feliciano's back. Feliciano let go right away, and Kiku was amazed he had. Feliciano laughed and smiled in his usual happy-go-lucky way.

"Ludwig says manners are the most important, so I've been working on them for him," he explained.

Nodding again, Kiku grabbed his things and then sat on one end of his bed. Feliciano took the other side, and without having to say anything they delved into diligently studying. Kiku always thought it was strange, but endearing that Feliciano was able to focus so well for someone who had the attention span of a puppy.

"Where's Heracles?" Feliciano asked.

Kiku had become so focused it took him a few moments to really understood what Feliciano had said. "He said he had somewhere to go, so that's why I invited you over."

Feliciano grinned like a fox and raised his eyebrows. "Why can't I be over when he's here? Are you two doing naughty things when you shut yourselves up all day?"

Kiku wished for a way to express his shock and horror, but nothing seemed to fit how he was feeling. He looked down at his notes with a fierce blush. Feliciano laughed, but a few moments later he was humming some song Kiku didn't recognize, lightly bouncing along with the tune.

.

"How were your midterms?" Yao asked.

He was walking next to Kiku, bundled up against the brisk winter weather. If Kiku was honest, he was glad they were long behind him and he wouldn't have to see Heracles for two weeks. He felt horrible thinking it, but since the day Feliciano had come over, things were horrible between them.

Their usual morning routine fell to pieces, Kiku couldn't even believe some of the things he saw when Heracles wasn't in a mood to bother with his more conservative ways. The most Kiku could say was that Heracles was certainly well endowed.

His face was already flushed from the cold, so he didn't worry about Yao noticing his blush from thinking such horrible things.

"I did as well as usual," Kiku said.

Yao nodded and smiled at Kiku. He pinched his little brother's cheek and pulled in an annoying way, speaking the way he would to a child. "I am so proud of you, Kiku! Your roommate kept his promise."

Kiku groaned, batting at Yao's hand and increasing the distance between them so he wouldn't have the chance to be annoying again. "I'm not a little kid anymore."

Yao raised his eyebrows, scoffing at Kiku and giving him a firm smack to the back of the head. "Not a child! Certainly, but _I _raised you."

The younger of the two rubbed at the back of his head, and sighed. "Do you need to remind me every time I see you? I know you raised me," Kiku said.

"Just knowing isn't enough for me," Yao said, "it has to be something you breathe and live by. If you just brush off everything I've taught you, you'll turn into a disgrace."

They arrived at Yao's house, only a twenty minute walk from Kiku's dormitory. He was thankful that even though the distance between them was small, Yao rarely ever visited. His work kept him busy enough that he seldom found time to bother his brother.

"I'm not a disgrace," Kiku said, taking his shoes off as they entered. Another set of shoes, far larger than his own or Yao's, were there too. "Do you have a friend over?" Kiku asked.

Yao nodded, carelessly tossing his ponytail over his shoulder as he walked to the kitchen. Kiku followed, helping Yao to get everything ready for lunch without being asked. "A coworker. He looks big and scary, but he is shy and will leave you alone."

Kiku didn't know who it was that Yao was referring to, but a clear image of Ludwig came to his mind, the description was just like him. "Why is he here?"

Yao shook his head and tsked at Kiku. "Aiyah, so many questions, Kiku. Help make lunch, don't interrogate me. He is just here until his flight tomorrow."

Kiku nodded and set about pulling ingredients out of the fridge. After eighteen years of dealing with his brother, they had a system down that was even more perfect than what Kiku and Heracles had had for a while. It was how Kiku lived, forever wanting to please the other person and never wanting to be in their way.

.

Kiku only saw Yao's guest one time, but he was extremely grateful for the brief encounter. He was sitting on the spare bed in a sort of guest room in the house, the room completely dark except for the light from the screen of his laptop.

It was around three in the morning, and he was watching all of the latest anime he hadn't been able to watch because of school. He assumed both Yao and his friend were asleep, but a creeping cold feeling came over him, like the feeling of being watched.

Normally, he didn't let things like hat get to him, but the feeling was starting to overwhelm him. It felt something similar to a panic attack, even though he told himself he was overreacting. Just to please his brain, he turned on the lamp to the left of the bed.

The room and hallway were flooded with light, and if Kiku were someone like Feliciano, he probably would have screamed at the sight he was greeted with. He hadn't even seen the hulking figure in the hall when it was dark, and the sudden appearance of a body there had his heart in his throat.

With a small yelp, the tall man vanished back towards Yao's room, but Kiku couldn't take his eyes off of the spot where he had been standing. How long had he been there? Had he just been watching Kiku the whole time, or had it been a coincidence that Kiku had turned on the light and he had been right in the doorway? Perhaps he had just been returning from the kitchen, but Kiku knew that wasn't the case. Yao, though, had not been exaggerating about the big and scary part.

He had seemed so small the instant Kiku had seen him, but for the moment it took the both of them to register each other, he had been horrifying. That night, he resigned to going to sleep before he kept himself up with paranoia all night long.

.

At around one the next day, Kiku finally woke up and blearily stumbled out of his room. Yao's guest was long gone, but Yao was sitting on the couch, legs crossed as he scrolled through his phone. His phone looked different somehow, it looked so similar to Kiku's phone.

"Did you and Heracles have a fight?" Yao asked, looking up from what was definitely Kiku's phone. "Was it your fault?"

Kiku couldn't bother to respond to his brother's questions. "Is that my phone?" he said, his tone sharp.

Yao laughed and rolled his eyes. "Kiku, if you don't want me to go through your phone, you should think of a better password than your birthday."

Kiku frowned and crossed his arms. Yao really could be the worst sometimes. "Yes, we have not been getting along recently."

"Is it your fault?" Yao asked, eyebrows raised. Kiku didn't really know why it mattered so much, he was an adult and could figure out his problems on his own.

"It started out as my fault," Kiku said. "But then..." he lost his voice. Was it Heracles' fault for developing feelings for him? Or for voicing those feelings? His stomach suddenly felt tight. "I think it's still my fault."

Yao nodded, and patted the space on the couch next to him. Kiku sat down where he had been indicated. "He texted you," Yao said. "Says he is sorry for making you uncomfortable. He will try to switch rooms before you come back, but there is no guarantee."

"He can't do that!" Kiku said. His voice had been found again.

"And why not?" Yao asked. "It's his choice, isn't it? And if you two couldn't figure out, maybe it's for the best."

"I don't want him to leave," Kiku said. "I..." he searched for the right words, everything either seemed too strong or too weak in the situation he was in. "I like him as my roommate. He is quiet, and we don't have to talk to each other all of the time. We don't get in each other's way ever, it's nice."

Yao nodded, still scrolling through Kiku's phone. "Maybe you should actually tell him that, Kiku, instead of telling me."

Kiku shook his head. "I could never tell him that, if he thinks he needs to leave, then I don't want to stop him."

"Why not?" Yao asked. "You like him don't you?"

"No!" Kiku exclaimed.

Yao raised his eyebrows at Kiku. "You don't like him?"

"Well, no, but also yes," Kiku said. "I don't know how to explain it. Yes, I like him, but no, not in the way you're thinking."

His older brother nodded and hummed quietly, thinking. "You still have to tell him. Otherwise I will, and I'll make sure to make it embarrassing."

Kiku's eyes widened. His first instinct was to snatch his phone from Yao, who handed it over calmly. "You can't just text people using my phone!" he said. Yao rolled his eyes, standing up from the couch with a smirk on his face. Kiku didn't like the look of that smirk. He looked through his phone like a madman the moment Yao entered his room and shut the door behind himself. Everything seemed to be the way he had left it the night before. Then a message from Heracles lit up on the screen of his phone.

_I had no idea you felt that way... can we talk?_

His blood turned ice cold, but then suddenly melted and began to boil. He had no idea what Yao had done, but this was not something he wanted to handle over his winter break, especially since he had only been away from Heracles for a day.

"Yao!" he snapped. Something in him was amazed that he had actually gotten angry, but certain situations called for certain measures. "What did you do!"

He could hear Yao laughing from his room.

* * *

A/N: Only two more chapters of this before I take like a month or so off to write the last chapter and begin the next fanfiction that will take this one's place, though I don't know if I will have it update on Thursdays like this one. Who knew five weeks was going to go by so fast? Also I apologize if the chapter seems a bit rushed, the next two will be a bit slower paced.


	6. Chapter 6

Kiku stared at his phone, the unanswered message glaring an imprint into his retinas. He couldn't shake his eyes from the screen, and his thumbs hovered over the buttons, unsure what to say. What was the proper procedure for handling older brothers who had overstepped their bounds? Was there even a procedure for such things? He seriously doubted that there was.

One hundred times he scrolled through the minuscule amount of messages he and Heracles sent to each other. Being together at nearly all times of the day didn't really require them to text as often as Kiku and Feliciano messaged each other. Nothing stood out in the messages, whatever Yao had sent Heracles had shortly been deleted.

"I just have to explain the situation," Kiku said. "He will understand... Probably."

_Heracles, Yao took my phone and sent whatever messages you were sent today. I apologize for the confusion_

Something in that message didn't seem right. He erased the message and then tried again.

_Heracles, I apologize for the confusion, Yao took my phone without my permission and sent you those messages_

That one seemed far better than the previous one, and before he could second-guess himself, Kiku sent the message and set aside his phone. He stood from the couch, and was about to go to the kitchen, before he thought better of his choices. He backtracked to the couch, and put the phone into his pocket. That way no nosy older brothers could send out any more messages without his consent.

He went back to the kitchen after retrieving his phone, and looked through the fridge. Almost always, Yao got up around five or six in the morning, from there made a huge breakfast, and would set half of it aside for Kiku. That day's breakfast was more of an American-style breakfast than Yao ever made, but Kiku wasn't about to complain. Right when he had the feeling that he was going to die from his nerves, toast, eggs and other small things, like fruit, sounded more than perfect to him.

He didn't bother putting any of it in the microwave, instead going straight to the kitchen table and sitting down to eat. It was a bad habit and if Yao caught him he would get a firm smack to the wrist, but Kiku took his phone out of his pocket, his heart feeling as though someone's hand was squeezing around it tighter and tighter.

Within the five minutes he had spent getting his breakfast, he had missed three calls from Heracles and ten messages.

"Maybe I shouldn't have my phone on silent all the time," Kiku mused. Already, Heracles was calling him again. The picture of a cat hovered on the flashing screen, the icon he had chosen for his roommate, thinking it was quite suitable for him. He hesitated, but then answered the call. The only good way to solve this problem would be to talk about it, not text about it.

"Heracles, I'm really sorry," Kiku said as soon as he put the phone to his ear, "I was finding breakfast."

Heracles hummed. They both fell silent, but not for long. "Did Yao really send those messages?" he asked.

Kiku nodded, even though Heracles couldn't see him. "Yes, and I'm sorry that he did. He deleted them right away, so I don't even know what he said to you..."

"The messages said that you like me and appreciate my company more than anyone else's, but you had just been too shy to say anything to me," Heracles said. "Is that not true?"

Kiku had to think about what he had just heard. It was true that he appreciated Heracles and sitting with him and the cats, the meals they shared together, the quiet they could sit for hours in, the philosophy rants they could both sit through. Did he like Heracles? Well, he _liked_ Heracles, but did he _like_ Heracles? The whole conversation was bordering on things he had never considered himself capable of feeling, nor had he ever considered those feelings.

"Kiku?" Heracles asked. Kiku hadn't said anything for a long time.

"Ah, right here!" Kiku said, rushing to get his thoughts into order. "I do like you, Heracles," Kiku said, "but not in the way you're thinking. Not in the way you like me."

Heracles softly hummed. Kiku felt bad, even though he knew he shouldn't. He was being honest with him, and that's what Heracles deserved after everything they had gone through, and after living together for nearly six months.

"I'm sorry that I assumed it was you that sent those messages," Heracles said. He sounded th same as when Yao had visited them for the first time, and Kiku asked about his mother. It was a hurt tone of voice, one that indicated he wanted the conversation to be over.

"No, no, Heracles," Kiku interrupted, he didn't want Heracles to hang up, he still felt horrible, "I'm the one who should be sorry. Even if it wasn't directly me, I got your hopes up, and now I just shot you down."

"It's not your fault," Heracles said. "You can't control how you feel, and I would feel worse if you lied and said you liked me back when really you didn't."

Kiku could feel an intense weight he didn't know was there, lifting from his shoulders. Within seconds he felt light as a bird. "Thank you for understanding, Heracles," he muttered. "But I know that I have to think more about how I feel. Because I do like you," Kiku said. Color was rising in his cheeks. "I feel like I could spend all day with you, but I don't have to say anything. It's nice."

"I agree," Heracles said. If Kiku didn't know Heracles, he would have thought he could hear a smile in the other's voice. But he _did_ hear a smile, and it forced him to smile in turn. "It was nice talking to you, I hope you have a good break."

"You too," Kiku said. He ended the call and finished his breakfast, his appetite returned in just a few short minutes of talking with Heracles.

.

Yao had taken him to the shopping mall of their city, and Kiku was drawn to everything cat-themed that he saw. It was disappointing that a majority of it was meant for women, he really wanted to get a gift for Heracles. As much as he would have preferred to get him something philosophy based, he still had little to no knowledge in the area, and would probably grab something dull or uninteresting.

The last thing he had seen that nearly screamed for him to buy it was an oversized, fluffy, cat-print sweater. Heracles would never wear it, but at least the two of them would get a good laugh out of it, even though neither of them really laughed. If worst came to worst, he could hand the gift over to Feliciano, there was no doubt that he would enjoy something silly and cheesy. Kiku didn't celebrate Christmas as much as Feliciano and Ludwig did, and he didn't know if Heracles did, but he still liked to exchange gifts with his friends.

In his left hand, he already had presents for Arthur and Alfred. For Arthur, a collection of all of Lewis Carroll's works. For Alfred, the three video games he had been pining over all year, but hadn't purchased. Even though Kiku didn't know Toris or Francis as well as he did Alfred and Arthur, he still got them gifts. For Toris, a warm winter hat and for Francis a recipe book. He also got Ludwig the same recipe book, and a set of markers Feliciano had been talking about.

Kiku always prided himself in knowing the smallest things that someone would mention that they wanted. It proved useful for birthdays and holidays when others scrambled to figure out last minute presents.

"You better not spend all of your money on other people," Yao chided. "You still have to think about yourself, Kiku."

"I know," Kiku said. "I still have enough to buy a book or maybe some new anime online."

Yao rolled his eyes, but smiled at Kiku. "You are so strange, Kiku," he said. "You had better be glad that I put up with you. I've had to do it for eighteen years, you know."

"Yes, Yao," Kiku said. "I know."

He had long since forgiven Yao for the incident with Heracles at the beginning of the winter break. He couldn't have even stayed mad at him for more than just a couple of hours.

"Are you ready to go back to school in a week?" Yao asked.

Kiku nodded. "I have a lot of easier classes this semester."

Yao gave Kiku a horrified look. "_Easy_? _Easy classes_? Kiku, you cannot afford to risk your education to take a few easy classes!" he snapped. A few people who were also shopping turned to look at them.

"Yao, please," Kiku hissed, "keep your voice down. I'm not taking basic classes, you misunderstood me."

"Then what kind of classes are you taking?" he asked, arms crossed over his chest. He was puffed out like an angry cat again.

"Another literature class, trigonometry, a few history classes," Kiku said. "Classes that are easier than last semester without being too easy."

Yao seemed content with his answer. "Hm, what do you think I should get Ivan?" he muttered, clearly not thinking that Kiku would hear him.

"A bell," Kiku said.

Yao laughed loudly, raising his eyebrows at Kiku. "A _bell_? So he does not sneak up on you? He was just curious, he didn't know who you were."

Kiku nodded, sighed, and looked at Yao. "He was still scary. A bell would be nice."

"I'm not getting him a bell," Yao said. "You won't even see him again, so it doesn't really matter if I don't."

"He seems nice enough," Kiku said.

Yao nodded. But he paused mid-step, and thought for a few moments. His eyes were transfixed on the wall for a good minute before he began to walk again. "Yes, he is nice. He is just very big and scary-looking, no one seems to understand that. But he is good with small animals, most of the time. He wants to run a pet store."

"A pet store?" Kiku asked. He didn't want to be rude, but he could feel a small chuckle at the base of his throat, begging to be released.

"Silly, isn't it?" Yao said, smiling softly. "He really likes hamsters."

Kiku couldn't help it. He laughed, even though it was a small one. Yao turned to him, both eyebrows raised in surprise.

"I can't remember the last time I heard you laugh," he said, his shock turning into a grin as he pulled Kiku into a tight hug. Kiku blushed dark red, but didn't try to break the contact. "The last time was when you were very little, I think."

"Don't get used to it," Kiku said. Yao eventually broke the hug, and ruffled Kiku's hair in an annoying older-brother way.

"I'll make sure I don't," Yao said, laughing and smiling.

.

After five months of time flying by, Kiku thought he would have figured out that every day seemed to be passing faster and faster. That every hour brought him closer to the next, and yet he had done nothing with that hour. He tried to not let thoughts like that get to him, but as he stood outside of his and Heracles' room, with only one day left of winter break, he stopped to wonder where the time had gone.

He and Heracles hadn't talked since the first day of break when they called each other. Kiku was nervous, but also very excited to be back. He had already dropped off everyone's gifts, some of whom, mostly Francis, were amazed that they had even gotten gifts from him.

"Ah, I will have to make you one of these recipes," Francis mused as he thumbed through the book.

Toris hadn't been there when Kiku stopped by, but he left the hat on his desk anyways.

"When will he be back?" Kiku asked Alfred who was fawning over the games. He practically stroked each of the covers, his eyes wide like he had just found ten million dollars.

"I'm not sure," Alfred said. He was clearly too distracted to really care. "Something happened with his boyfriend."

Kiku nodded, and left to stand outside of his and Heracles' room, which he was still doing. There was no way to tell if Heracles was inside or not. He knocked on the door, and waited for a response. Heracles was there no less than ten seconds later, and Kiku felt so small. Had Heracles grown so much over two weeks, or did Kiku only just then realize how tall he really was?

"Hello," Heracles said as he stepped aside for Kiku. "I hope you had a good break."

Kiku nodded as he entered their room. The smell was so familiar, it was nothing like Yao's house. "I did, thank you. What about you?" he asked as he began to rummage through the bags of things he had, looking for the sweater.

"It was okay," Heracles responded. He sat down on his bed, watching Kiku. "Did you lose something?"

"No, no," Kiku said, "it's here somewhere. A gift for you."

"You didn't have to get me anything," Heracles said.

"I wanted to," Kiku murmured as he finally found the sweater, turning around and holding it up. Heracles raised his eyebrows. "Even if you don't like it, it was cute and on sale," Kiku said. "You could just give it to Feliciano."

Heracles shrugged. He stood and took the sweater from Kiku, and then slipped it over his head. It was a bit snug in places, mainly around his broad shoulders. Kiku had never seen him look more ridiculous, and he quietly laughed.

"I think it suits you," he said. He looked up at Heracles once he had calmed his short burst of laughter, and all of the air left his lungs. Heracles was smiling. It was a warm smile, like everything else about him. His eyes were so full of tenderness, Kiku's heart raced.

He stepped closer to Kiku, his voice lowered. "Can I ask you something?"

Kiku nodded. He didn't know what he could say in such a situation.

Heracles' eyes darted to the door, making sure it was shut before he proceeded. "You can say no at any time," he said. Kiku nodded again. He felt sick, but also strangely excited. What exactly did Heracles have planned? "Can I hold your hand?"

Kiku almost burst out laughing again, but Heracles seemed so serious that the laughter died before it hit the air between them. "Yes," he said.

Heracles took Kiku's hand, and laced their fingers together. Kiku could feel a light puff of air against his cheeks every time Heracles exhaled. The contact had Kiku close to fainting.

"Can I kiss you?" Heracles asked.

Kiku took much longer to respond that time. Did he want Heracles to kiss him? Did he feel that way about Heracles? Did it really matter if he didn't? Wouldn't it be better to see if he did or didn't? Too many thoughts were in his head, it was making him dizzy. He could hardly think about the word _kiss_ for more than a second before he felt the world spinning beneath his feet.

"Yes," he said.

His heart was in his throat, pounding furiously. He didn't know if it was regret or excitement that boiled in his stomach, making him feel sick. The world continued to spin around him, yet all he could see was Heracles. His intense, but kind green eyes. His worn, but soft skin. The small smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth as he leaned forward. Kiku couldn't be sure if Heracles was moving so slowly, or if his brain wasn't able to function at a normal speed.

Heracles' lips were against his in a moment, and it was like kissing fire.

Everything became sharper, Kiku could hear Alfred laughing loudly down the hallway, Ludwig scolding Feliciano for something a couple rooms over. He thought he could hear Heracles' heartbeat, despite how impossible that was. Their eyes were closed, but Kiku didn't need his eyes. If they could stay like that for the rest of his life, Kiku would sacrifice his eyesight in a heartbeat.

The kiss was chaste, and so sweet, but Kiku needed more. Heracles' spare hand was on the back of his neck, pulling him closer, deepening their contact. But he never pressed for more or moved forward.

All too soon, the contact was gone, and Kiku could feel himself trying to follow that missing contact. Heracles ran his hand through Kiku's hair, and Kiku finally opened his eyes. Heracles was smiling again. It was small, but it was there. He was smiling, too. It felt strange, it wasn't something he did as often as other people.

"Thank you," Kiku said. He didn't know what he was thanking Heracles for, but the words seemed right.

"No need to thank me." Heracles' hand lowered to his cheek, and Kiku turned to nuzzle against the warmth. He brought his own free hand to rest over Heracles', looking up at the brunet. "I missed having a roommate," Heracles said. "I missed _you_."


End file.
